Life is pretty busy. I won't get into the in'n'out of what my days are like but lately I haven't been able to train as much as I would prefer. Often times I can only manage once a week but am still very grateful for that bit of time. Perhaps the anticipation of the weekend's training makes it that much sweeter. I may not have the fitness level that I had a month ago but I still manage to do alright considering my infrequent training schedule. So what does have to do with balance? I'll get there...
This past weekend I came to the Saturday morning class with a loaded sense of purpose having not trained all week, aching to unleash the fury within. I know that sounds kinda weird and for some inappropriate but I was really excited to train. I quickly realized my expectations and the reality were not one in the same. Perhaps the difference was only noticeable to myself but a difference nonetheless. My first reaction was frustration and some self-deprecating comments but I persevered. I wouldn't waste the one day I had to feeling bad for myself.
Taking a moment to reflect on what wasn't working, it was pointed out to me that my problem wasn't dealing with the attack or sweep itself, it was an absence of prevention. It's one thing to be capable of escaping the armbar or choke with technique but it's an entirely different thing to map out what leads to the attack and prevent that from happening. What were the first steps that lead to me getting my back taken? to me getting swept? It came down to me overextending myself. On one level I was physically doing this by expecting more than what I had trained for and literally, I was making mistakes with my grips and giving my opponent too many handles to take advantage of. Overreaching into the opponents guard I overextending my weight and sense of balance. Over committing to a grip that wasn't necessary. I was insisting on something to the point that it did more harm than good. Perhaps the metaphor is a bit cheesy but it really came down to me coming to terms with what my intentions were in contrast to the situation at hand. Instead of being 'in the now' and reacting to it, I pushed for something regardless if it was there to be taken.
So it's with this a-ha moment that I start my week. Doing my best to accomplish as much as I can without burning out or coming down on myself for not completing 1000 different tasks. And...enjoying the moment for what it is.